West Mifflin Football Club victorious in friendly

Friendly 1 (and only)

West Mifflin Football Club 5 – 1 Wolfpack

Reed 15”* (1-0)
Volk 23” (2-0)
Volk 53” (3-0)
Some Guy 62” (3-1)
Lee 75” (4-1)
Lacock 86” (5-1)

*times are made up

On Tuesday night, West Mifflin Football Club traveled the short trip down the Route 51 corridor for a friendly against Championship E Division rivals Wolfpack at Elizabeth Forward High School. It was the first match action for the squad this season. Only eleven players made the trip through the rain while Bob Stinner assumed role of coach while nursing an ankle injury. The starting lineup looked like this (I think):

GK-Reed (Rotating)
Sweeper – Matt Sax
RB – Eton
LB – Nickel
Stopper– Drewski
RCM – Pcholinski
LCM – Matthew Alan Baguet
RW – Tyler
LW – Kutcher
ST – Volk
ST – Daveon

The field was mucky and resembled a huge bowl of shit. It was worse than Borland – a fact that many Blues supporters find impossible to comprehend - but I swear it, that’s the truth. It should also be noted that Chris Reed drives like a maniac. Stinner and Pcholinski both commented to me while walking to the pitch that they were thankful they were still alive for the game. Pcholinski said, “At one point we were approaching a red light and he (Reed) almost hit into the back of a truck stopped at a red light. He turned and said ‘I was just looking around.’ Crinky!” It is understandable for Reed to have a lead foot, what with his mass and everything. However, he appeared to defy gravity in the 15th minute when he nodded home WMFC’s first goal of the summer. The ball was crossed in by someone after a long corner by Baguet (I think) and just as I looked up I saw Reed’s girth tilted slightly and about one and a quarter centimeters off of the ground. Although he was not high off the ground he did really well to glance the ball into the corner. It was a very pretty goal to watch and with that it was one-nil WMFC. And so, some more shit happened here and there. WMFC really controlled the possession and the flow of the game. The passing was very good and if it weren’t for the quality of the pitch, it would have been very beautiful stuff to watch. The defense looks very solid and the communication from the eleven was good. Since I was high on Motrin and still reeling from Reed’s driving on the way in, I don’t remember how the second goal was setup. I do remember it being caught by the keeper only to see it trickle into the net. The third, however, was a beauty. Although I can not recall who started the motion, the brunt of the work was smoothly completed by Reed and Pcholinski, passing amongst themselves beautifully to and from up the middle (right/left side?) of the pitch. It ended with a lovely through-ball to the Volkster who finished with typical Volk-aplomb – a roper into the back of the net. It really was lovely and if the Blues plan on making a run for the division this season the three involved will have to play a massive part. After that move, I think they are ready. Two newcomers finished the scoring for the Blues after Some Guy picked up a consolation goal for the Wolfpack. Similar to Robin van Persie’s consolation against Man Utd in the Champions League Semi Final except the Guy didn’t score it against the biggest pack of rabid cuntbags ever to breath. F*cking twats. Anyway, Lacock found himself more open than a skank’s vag right inside the box (no pun intended) and instead of ripping his first for the Blues unselfishly slid it off to Daveon who similarly slid the ball into the net for his first. Good work between the two new boys. The fluent work amongst all of the newcomers was a welcome sight after the club lost so many familiar faces over the close-season. Lacock eventually got his first when a bunch of stuff happened that I don’t remember and he kicked the ball into the net. I apologize Tyler but I can’t remember all of the goals especially ones that are particularly as boring and nondescript as yours. No offense. Good work though. That did it for the scoring and the Blues go into the regular season this Sunday with a victory under their belts. A small sample size, yes, but better to have a ‘W’ than a stinker, no?

I am sure many are wondering about how well the new faces did in their first organized match. Well, in a word, they were all excellent. Eton and Sax marshaled at the back and have shown that they are capable of shoring up any of the holes left by departures this season. Nickel (Not a newcomer) played a very solid game as he always does as well so a neat back three seems to have emerged. Drew showed that he is a very skilled all-around player. His skill and willingness to play where needed is something the squad needs. He is sure with the ball and was strong at stopper…(ehh) stopping and distributing the ball well. Kutcher had a good game as well. He was keen with his passes, worked hard to get the ball, and used skill to go around players when needed. He will do wonders on the wings or in defense this season. I already touched on Lacock and Daveon (no homo) for their goals but they also played well, giving the defense trouble throughout although Lacock fell on his ass and slid several yards which was hilarious. Jared Pcholinski is a cunt. Baguet had a solid game as always but the most important part is, he didn’t break down like the 58 year old man that works with him at Shalom that looks exactly like him because of leg cramps. Overall, it was a good performance and we are now looking forward to the start of the regular season which will kick off this Sunday, May 10th (Mother’s Day) at 11:00a at the vaunted Borland Park. So, bring your mum and sturdy ankle braces so you don’t end up crippled. I leave you with some media from the game. Til' next time...


WMFC new boy Tony Kutcher sends a long ball up the pitch.


Baguet being a cunt.


New boys Drewski and Eton.


Captain and co-captain keeping the troops grounded at halftime.


Volkster absolutely disgusted that it was his turn to play keeper.


Daveon.


Tyler Lacock tying his shoes.



Match action.