In attack, Anthony Degerolamo makes his return after a season-long absence due to unrepentant homosexuality. Managing Director Bob Stinner said:
Joining Degerolamo in attack, and also making his triumphant return to West Mifflin football, is the Ginger Prince, West Mifflin's own Flying Tomatoe, Trevor Kidd. Mr Kidd had a run with WMFC this winter in the RMU Indoor Soccer league at Neville Island. He netted a few and did pretty well for having not played soccer in over five years. He also displayed some of his more honed skills such as eating Subway just ten minutes before kickoff and getting sick, almost killing himself and two other passengers on the way to the game by driving like a maniac, listening to terrible, God awful music, and handling the ball before scoring.
I don't know what we're going to get from him. He's always been a camping twat and he's been off for over a year doing nothing but playing Call of Duty so, we'll have to see what he can give us. I wouldn't be surprised if he ran to the top of the bleachers, planting an imaginary claymore on his way, and getting down on his stomach to pretend to snipe the Spetsnaz like he was in a Brazilian favela. Ahh, what a cunt.
Finally, Mr Wonderful, Chad Perry has agreed on a deal with WMFC that would only see him come into the first team as goalkeeper when WMFC number one Rob Vargo is unable to play. So, we expect to see a lot of Perry since Vargo often takes games off to celebrate events such as Memorial Day, Independence Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Arbor Day, World AIDS Day, Rosh Hashanah, Pi Day, the start of Ramadan, and National Bubba Day (it's real, Google it).
These are the new and returning players to the WMFC squad. They will join up with the regulars such as Pcholinski, Stinner, Reed, Vargo, and Lacock as the Blues fight for Championship East Division dominance.